Feeling stuck inside of a relationship is no fun. In order to become “unstuck,” you have to make a move. The first step of your movement should be to assess why and how you arrived at the space of feeling stuck. The answer will be…you stopped moving! If you’re feeling stuck, ask yourself, “What did I stop doing that I used to do? How many fun things have I stopped doing? How many fun things am I doing now?” It can get a little tricky when you start asking yourself these questions because it may give you some truth you’re not ready to accept. There may be a little voice inside your belly screaming, “I’m unhappy and I don’t want this anymore.” However, the fear of hurting the other person, losing your security and being judged by others controls your choice to make a healthy move. So, you do nothing and settle for feeling stuck. Guess what? You have options! Here’s what you can do if you feel stuck:
- Reach out for help. Consider seeking counseling or talking to someone who can offer you’re a healthy and balanced perspective.
- Move! This can include communicating your true feelings to the person inside of the relationship with you. Communication can include writing a letter, sending an email, trying something new; buying a new book and reading a few pages with your partner.
- If you’ve figured out why you feel stuck and have chosen to remain stuck, ask yourself, “What am I afraid of losing?” Are you afraid of change, being alone, losing security, comfort, etc.?
- Still don’t have an answer? Go back to the first bullet point.
Here’s some good news. If you are aware of feeling stuck, you now have some really great information because you cannot change what you’re not aware of. Your “stuck feeling” is telling you that something needs to change and things are not fine the way they are right now. Since you are aware of this information, you can get to the business of making some adjustments. Becoming unstuck is within your power as you have the choice to make a move.